What do you do when your dog becomes possessive of a certain object such as a bone, a toy or a sock?
Here are my suggestions for dealing with a dog’s possessiveness:
First of all, nothing should ever be given to a dog for free. Even if certain objects “belong” to the dog, he should only be allowed to touch them with permission from his owner.
Some people will allow aggressive behavior from a dog when the dog is being possessive of food or toys that “belong” to him. It’s easy to make excuses for the dog, but possessiveness of toys or food or random objects should never be tolerated.
Some dog owners even believe their dog is showing aggression because the dog is “protecting” the toy or believes the toy is his baby. Trust me, dogs do not think their toys or other objects are their babies. Believing so would be humanizing the dog.
What starts out as minor possessiveness of a stuffed toy can easily escalate to much more serious aggression. Dogs that are allowed to show possessiveness of their food and toys often begin to show possessiveness of other objects such as socks, table scraps or even people.
How to prevent a dog’s possessive behavior
These are some tips you can use to work with your puppy or dog to prevent issues with possessiveness from developing. It’s much easier to prevent a problem than correct a problem!
1. A dog should always be given a clear set of rules.
The owner is in charge, not the dog.
My mutt Ace works for his food, works for my attention and works for playtime. If he wants something, I will make him sit or lie down before he can have it. Ace understands I can take his food or toys away at any given time, and I often do. And just because something is in his mouth does not mean it’s off limits to me or any other person. I take things from him all the time just to prove my point. I also give things back to him as a reward or I trade him for something even better!
2. Make sure you “claim” anything you give your dog.
At feeding time, I always require that Ace gives me about five feet of space before he is given permission to approach his bowl. Just because I set the bowl on the ground does not give him permission to come running up and grabbing it. He has to wait. I wish I could teach my cat the same!
It’s also a good idea to take your dog’s food away while he is eating. Have him sit or lie down, and then give the food back. If necessary, step over the bowl and move into your dog’s space the way a dominant dog would do.
With toys, it is the same concept. You own the toys. You can take them away at any time, and you should. Don’t allow the dog to grab toys out of your hand until you say it’s OK.
3. When your dog has a toy, offer him something even better!
Drop random pieces of chicken in your dog’s bowl while he is eating so he learns that good things happen when you approach his bowl! When he’s chewing on a bone, randomly come up to him and sprinkle liver treats or other goodies around him.
4. Teach the dog the command “leave it.”
I use the “leave it” command for any object, and all it means is “Do not touch.”
Teach this command by rewarding the dog with food when he leaves the object alone. Since my dog loves tennis balls, I’ll put a ball on the ground and say “leave it.” When I’m ready for him to pick up the ball I say “OK!” You could also say “Take it!” Ace now understands that “leave it” can be transferred to anything such as food or even nasty things he finds out in the yard.
Preventing possessive behavior is much easier than correcting it, so the most important part is to set clear rules for the dog before any issues come up.
I also want to point out that a dog can be obsessive without being possessive, but neither behavior should be encouraged. Ace is obsessed with retrieving and will bring a ball to someone over and over, but he has no problem allowing any person or dog to take the ball right out of his mouth.
How to stop a dog from showing possessiveness
1. Do not make up excuses for your dog’s possessive or aggressive behavior.
Small problems lead to bigger problems when dog owners do not take a dog’s mild aggression or possessive issues seriously.
Of course, some dogs sound aggressive when they are playing with toys. This is normal as long as the dog is just playing and will allow you to take the toy and end the game at any time. For more information, see my post on why does my dog growl at other dogs?
2. Begin “claiming” everything you give the dog, even if you consider it “his.”
Deliberately place the object on the ground and do not allow the dog to approach or take the object until you give him permission. If the dog tries to take the object too early, correct him instantly and put him in a sit or down position. Stand over the object the way another dog would.
Be careful not to frustrate your dog. Deliberately requiring your dog to wait for an object should be a healthy challenge for him. If he seems stressed out about this process, then give him treats while he waits for the original object. Remember to tell him how good he is. Then, give a command such as “OK” to take the original object.
3. Create situations where the dog is likely to become possessive.
Unfortunately, the only way to break a dog from a certain behavior is to catch him in the act. It does not work to simply take the bone away and hide it. This is like a “time out” and teaches the dog nothing. If the dog is possessive about rawhides, you’re going to have to present rawhides to him every day and correct him the second he becomes possessive.
Put a leash on the dog to give yourself more control and confidence. Then, purposely drop a rawhide and correct him the second he goes for it. The dog must learn to wait until you give him permission to take the rawhide. Practice this multiple times a day. Dogs need a lot of repetitions before a behavior becomes conditioned, so be patient.
Give your dog highly valued treats whenever he drops the object or waits to pick up the object. Make this process fun rather than stressful. You want to be the leader, but you want to be a fun leader.
4. Teach the dog that you can take anything at any time.
In order to practice this, you will have to allow the dog to pick up the object. Make sure to do so once you have claimed it and given him permission to take it. Once he has it in his mouth, take it away again but give it back as a reward. Practice this over and over every day. Taking something, holding it for a few seconds while praising your dog and then giving it back will teach your dog that you’re not necessarily taking the object away for good.
5. When the dog shows aggression, “trade” him for something better.
Do not hesitate to seek help from a professional dog trainer in your area if you are at all hesitant about approaching your aggressive dog. If you are tentative and giving off a weak energy, your dog is more likely to bite you.
If your dog becomes aggressive once he has an object in his mouth, do not allow him to keep the object. If you allow your dog to keep his bone every time he growls at you, then he will be rewarded for growling. The aggression is reinforced.
To get the desired object away from your dog once he is showing aggression, I recommend using the “trade” method. Give him something better than what he has. Practice this over and over again.
What do you do to prevent possessive behavior from your dog?
Discuss this issue further at That Mutt’s new dog training forum – How to stop a dog’s possessiveness
Possessiveness. Now that’s a lot of S’s.
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We have a 7 month old whom we’ve had since she was 7 weeks old. She has nipped, growled, and bitten our children and other children when they are near her food or try to take something she shouldn’t have. (this has happened a total of 8 times since we got her). Now she’s recently growled over toys and her crate. I can’t have her biting anyone, but I don’t want to get rid of her . We’ve always done “drop it” and have traded her for treats, we’ve let the kids feed her handfuls of kibble at meal times, we’ve taken toys etc. away from her during play times… but I’m sorry to say the few times she’s bitten or growled I have only been right there to correct her immediately the past two times. I think she sees the kids as her litter mates. I’ve read that I should always monitor any interaction with the children and the dog, but this is simply unrealistic unless she spends a majority of her day in her crate. Any thoughts?
You should definitely supervise the children and the dog whenever they are together. You can buy baby gates to block the dog in certain areas of the house so she doesn’t have to be in her crate when you are not watching her.
Besides biting the kids, does she show dominance over them in other ways? Does she jump all over them? Push them out of her way? Take their toys and run off? Usually there are other signs that the dog thinks she is in charge before actual biting/growling occurs. Your dog needs to know that all the people are in charge of her, including the kids.
Hi, thanks for getting back to me. No, she doesn’t do any of those other behaviors. We have read a lot and understand her need to know her place in the “pack”. Not sure how to teach the kids to show her that she is not in charge. We have had them feed her and walk her. They put her in her crate, trained with her in classes, been in charge of treats. She seems to be fairly tolerant of being pulled, squeezed, squished, etc. She is very receptive to my husband and I, and will listen to the kids when given a command, but it’s not the same as when I call her, or ask her to do something.
Do you think your dog just needs a break from the kids sometimes? Does she go in her crate because she wants to get away from them?
I think you are doing all the right things by including the kids in her training and walking. When they walk her, do they make her walk in a formal heel position? Do they practice obedience commands with her? Those would all be good things to keep doing. You may also want to consider having a trainer come to your house and work with you, your dog and the kids together.
Hi Lindsay. Kudos for having such an informative blog and for sharing your knowledge of dog behavior with frustrated/desperate dog parents! I have two male Siberian Huskies, 4 years and 7 months old. I am a pretty firm/strict Mama, since I’ve had this breed my whole life and I know how challenging they can be if you don’t give them boundaries and miles of exercise. We have none of the food aggression or possessiveness that a lot of dog owners have mentioned on here, but despite my best efforts, we have a couple of problems I haven’t been able to figure out.
When I got my oldest boy, he was an only dog and I took him to the park 4 to 5 times a week as a pup. He is a now well-adjusted dog who plays with big and small dogs just fine. His only issue (and it’s a bad one) is when people bring squeaky toys to the dog park. It’s like an instinctive switch is tripped and he goes after the dog who is chasing the toy. He has never drawn blood, but he does lunge at the dogs’ necks and try to make them submit while growling and snapping at them. This has happened every time a dog has not walked away from his bared teeth over a squeaky toy. As a result, I am always on high alert for squeakers and I must appear insane when I yell at people to please hang on to their squeakers until I can grab my dog!! How should I go about fixing this? I know I have to catch him right before he goes for it, or he completely ignores me. But he’s usually on the run already and I’m too far to get to him in time before the scrapping starts. Any ideas?
My other little problem is with socializing my 7 month old. Since he had a big brother to play with and I have a good-sized yard, I didn’t take him much to the dog park and as a result I have a 45-lb ball of energy that has no idea running 100mph into a strange dog’s face is inappropriate behavior. He also tries to mouth on the dogs like he would his brother, but mouthing combined with his energy and relentlessness has also led to more than one angry dog owner huffing out of the park. I know he isn’t just being aggressive because I understand Husky behavior, but I am also worried about him upsetting the wrong dog and ending up at the vet’s office. Any tips? I’m guessing you will say smaller groups of dogs we know? Anything else that could help besides just letting him take his “licks” like all puppies do when they’re learning?
Thanks for reading, and thanks again for taking the time to share what you know!
I would practice getting your older husky to listen to you 99 percent of the time when you call him. And then get him to make eye contact when you say “watch.” If you can achieve those two things, you will be able to get control of him in almost any situation. You will have to practice this dozens of times, probably hundreds of times, in areas other than the dog park where it is easier for your dog to concentrate. Then progress to more challenging situations like quiet hours at the dog park and then busier times. It’s not an easy fix and will take a lot of time. If you are up for it, you could also try an e-collar so you can correct your dog the instant he is thinking about going after another dog. Then reward when he breaks focus from that dog and comes to you instead.
For your younger dog, yes, smaller groups will definitely help
Also exercising him a lot before you go to the park so he has less excitement when he’s charging up to the other dogs. Take him running before you go to the park or at least play some tug of war games. It would help if you could go for walks with your friends dogs so he can learn to just chill out and walk with other dogs rather than play, play, play! Also group obedience classes are good.
Hi, I just had been reading this and I could use advice on my two pups. When all toys are picked up they play nicely and take turns being dominant. However, once the toys are introduced the older one will take everything for himself. The younger dog seems to think of this as a game as I see him often do a play bow to the other, but the older dog just seems to get frustrated and growl. I know he’s trying to be dominant and I try to redirect him to something even better, which doesn’t phase him, but the younger dog needs to chew and play with toys, and they each have the one same object/bone, but how can I get the older one to understand that he doesn’t need to be possessive with everything? Food however does not seem to be an issue. They could almost eat out of the same bowl (they do not but the first couple of days with the younger pup he would stick his head in the bowl and there was no fighting since he didn’t know there was a bowl for him.) This seems to be no possessiveness over food like the toys. Any tips are appreciated. Thanks!
Does your older dog allow you to take away the toys? I would start with that. Make sure he knows that everything is ultimately yours. If he is OK with you taking things away, then progress to having him lie down and stay while you interact with the toys and your younger dog. Reward your older dog for sitting calmly by giving him his favorite treats or inviting him to play.
Also make sure to teach a command for “drop.” Use his favorite treats as a reward or give the toy right back. You may have to use a very highly valued treat like real chicken. You can practice this without your younger dog around at first. Then practice when both dogs are playing. Try to stay positive and keep it fun. Give both dogs treats when they are sharing nicely.
Hi Lindsay,
Just wanted to say thank you for posting this! Just found it googling possessiveness in dogs. My pup, Sally, a 6 year-old silky terrier, has been acting awful when she is chewing on a treat (rawhide or jerky) if anyone goes near her. She will growl if I get close to her and she will snap and even bite if I try to take it away. It is so unacceptable! She just acted the worst she ever has, so I had to do a search and learn how to correct this issue.
The trade method easily did the trick to get it away from her. I did this search because I had friends over and she was acting soo demonlike, it was embarrassing! I’ll definitely follow the rest of this advice and hopefully we’ll break her of the habit!
So glad I could help!
I just bought my Shih Tzu a bone that has chicken flavor on it. She sat down as to protect it. I tried to pick her up to take her to bed and she started growling at me. I kind of got scared because I didn’t want her to bite me. What should I do?
I would follow the steps and suggestions listed in this post and in the comments. Your best bet is to teach her a drop command and get to the point that she will drop anything no matter what in order to get an even better reward. Of course, it won’t work to only practice this when she has something she thinks is really great. This is something you’ll have to work on every day by purposely giving her something and then having her drop it for something better until she automatically does it.
I have an aggressive mix that I got from th pound he is constinly trying to fight with other dogs ? What do I do
I can’t possibly help you with such little information. I suggest you get him into some obedience classes where he can learn to focus and relax around other dogs. Increase his exercise (I’m talking about an hour of walking with you every single day at a minimum). And slowly introduce him to other dogs while avoiding eye contact and tension between the dogs. Here is a post on preventing dogs from meeting head on:
http://www.thatmutt.com/2010/08/12/prevent-dogs-from-meeting-head-on/
will someone please suggest how I can teach this 5# Rat 1yr old shelter Terrier how not to be so possive of me, I have her on trail for 1 week Ive become attached, problem is she doesnt seem to like my husband very well and if we can[‘t get her used to him by this friday she may have to go back, breaking my heart, when she growls most of the time she is sitting next to me, i put her down on the floor when she does it everytime, but sheesh she doesnt give in to easy.. anymore suggestion please…
please help me keep Daisy
You have to do a lot of ignoring her. Don’t hold her at all. And encourage your husband to spend time taking her for walks or doing something she loves like playing with a squeaky toy. Here is a post I’ve written about how to help a dog feel more secure when she is constantly trying to lean on her owner or sit on her owner:
http://www.thatmutt.com/2011/11/11/why-does-my-dog-lean-on-me/
what would you recommend i do with this situation. I’ve recently adopted a 1yr old husky. after a few days of training her, because she was possessive with my other dogs food ect.. (shes amazing now everythings good) But what she does now is that i’ll give my dogs a bone and she will try to take it from them. she will stalk them as their prey, she has gone far to take anything from my german mix’s mouth which is very unexpectable. what would you recommend it do???
Do they fight over the bones and other things? Do your other dogs snap or growl when the husky takes things? As long as the other dogs don’t seem to mind, I’ll usually just allow the more dominant dog to take what he or she wants from the others. But I will supervise and make sure the dog understands I (as the leader) can take whatever I want at any time. And I’ll make sure to do just that.
I have a 9 year old AKC English Springer Spaniel. she is a beautiful dog and behaves failrly well and I love her very much and I think she knows that. But there are times when she acts like a very spoiled little child! If I go into another room or step outside she runs and quickly grabs something she knows she shouldn’t and runs inside her indoor crate and will not let me take the item from her, she growls and shows her teeth if I even attempt to take it from her, therefore I don’t, I don’t want to get bit, if it’s a towel or something she may start tearing it up or not it may just lay there but she just won’t let me come near it. Please help me stop this behavior I will do whatever suggestions you can share. I have already been trying the leave it or drop it and gave her a small treat when she obeyed. Help please!
Another important part of this is to do everything to prevent these kinds of situations. Maybe you keep her kennel door closed when you don’t need to leave her in there. Or, have her drag her leash around so you can grab the leash when needed. If she does steal something, then she will have nowhere to retreat to and you can step on the leash and then step on the object and reclaim it.
For trading her with a treat, you will have to use a very highly valued piece of food like hamburger or steak or chicken, whatever she likes best.
Another thing to consider is whether your dog is getting enough attention. Do you exercise her enough? Do you give her enough training and other mental challenges. She may be just bored when she takes a towel or other object.
Thanks so much, I have thought of that too about the attention part, and that is why she does take things she knows she will get some even tho it’s not the right kind like when I scold her. I have always thought I have given her enough, maybe not as far as Lexi is concerned tho. Might work on that along with the other suggestions. Thanks again!
Glad I could help. Let me know how it goes!
I got a rescue dog about 3 months ago that had clearly been abused in the past. He has serious aggression over his bones. He always sleeps right next to me in the couch or bed and recently when my boyfriend goes to move him he gets really agressive and tries to bite him. Really don’t know what to do.
It sounds like your dog is guarding you. I’m sure you are his sense of security, quite possibly something he has never had before. He may also be a bit fearful of your boyfriend. I recommend you contact a reputable trainer or behaviorist in your area for some help if the aggression does not get better very soon.
I suggest you do not allow your dog to sleep in your bed at all. Don’t allow him on the couch either. Teach the dog some boundaries. If he jumps onto the couch, push him off. You don’t have to be mean about it. You just want to prevent putting him in a situation where he becomes possessive, which happens on the furniture.
Here are some other posts you might find helpful:
http://www.thatmutt.com/2011/11/11/why-does-my-dog-lean-on-me/
http://www.thatmutt.com/2011/12/07/dog-owners-need-to-be-open-to-change/
I am a teenager who loves dogs. When my dog got hit by a car we talked about getting another dog for a while. We finally got a 3 year old rotweiler named rocky from my moms friend. He is mine and I love him a lot. He is super friendly and happy except when it comes to food and toys. A trainer told me to put my hand in his dish and feed it to him. That started to work but not for anyone else in my family. Whenever someone comes near he snarls and growls. He is worse with toys. We can’t give him any toys because he will not give them up and snarls. We tried trading multiple times but be won’t budge. We think this behavior is because he was beaten and fed little. Do you think I can break these habits? Any suggestions?
When you are dealing with aggression from a powerful dog, I recommend you consult with a trainer or behaviorist in your area. You don’t want to get hurt.
I do think you can help him by teaching him that you (or your family members) are going to give him even tastier treats when you approach his food dish or his toy. Start by just walking by and dropping little pieces of chicken or hamburger or whatever it is that he likes best. With toys, distract him away with something even better. Then, have him sit or lie down to get the treat so he doesn’t think he is being rewarded for aggression. He’ll think he’s being rewarded for sitting.
Obviously, prevention can go a long way. Don’t give him certain things like bones unless he is in his kennel or safely put away in a bedroom where he won’t feel like he needs to guard the item.
I also suggest you use the “nothing is for free” method of training. Make him sit before he gets anything. Make him sit even before you do things he enjoys like heading out for a walk and that type of thing. Before you give him anything – food, a bone, a toy, make him work for it.
But ultimately, keep your own safety in mind. Do be careful and get help if you think you need it.
I have a 7 year old golden retriever mix who’s great about food and kids and the like, but she’s really possessive of her toys. Now that she’s living with another dog, she’ll growl and grab toys out of his mouth. Now the other dog is intimidated and drops them when she comes near. I’ve been taking the toys from her if she takes them from him and reprimand her with a firm “NO”, but it doesn’t seem to get through to her. If I see her going towards the other dog with the intention of taking the toy, I will stop her and try to redirect her thoughts to a toy that she already has. I don’t want this behavior to get worse and become more aggressive. What do you suggest?
I like your idea of stopping her before she has a chance to take the other dog’s toys. Re-directing her attention is a good idea. How does she respond to command such as drop and leave it? I would definitely teach her those and practice until she responds 99 percent of the time. Also make her do something before she gets a toy, and don’t keep toys out all the time. While the dogs are playing, make sure to take the toys away every now and then. Make her wait until you give a command to take the toys again. Also have her practice down and stay while you play with the other dog and the toys. All of these little exercises practiced for a few short sessions each day should help her. You may already be doing all of these things. I’m not sure.
I have a 2 y/o Lab who has become noticeably possessive as of late. She is the sweetest dog and still very much a puppy. But I think some bad habits are starting to develop. We take her to the dog park nearly 4 times a week, and she got bit by a Doberman who was tormenting all the dogs in the park. Now she is pretty anti social with dogs, and really is just interested in the tennis balls around the park. BUT she thinks they are all hers and most people can’t play fetch with their own dog. If I throw a ball, she goes after it and then will find another or go for someone else’s. If I do not throw one, she will come behind me with ball in mouth and nudge the back of my legs, or find someone with a ball chucker and run circles around them until she throw one. She try to gather all the balls in the park and runs around with a ball in her mouth and gets snippy when another dog comes near. Yesterday, I tried to hold her collar and kneel with her while another dog came to get “her” ball, and she went crazy. Mistake? I had to get her on a leash and she wouldn’t even walk normally with me to the truck. Literally, pulling her. Very uncharacteristic.
At home she will usually give us her toys, but often tries to play “tug of war” with some. She will drop a toy if you touch her ear, which is strange to me. After reading the previous post, her “toy box” is gonna have to go away at home. But I want her to be more approachable with other dogs at the dog park. I want to get another dog, but I don’t want conflicts, so I think if I can break it now at the dog park it will be good in the future. Any suggestions?? Thanks in advance
I would follow some of the same advice I’ve given to others. Find other ways to exercise your dog. Take her running or walking every day. Then use the dog park as extra exercise and for socialization, not her main form of exercise. It sounds like she is quite wound up at the dog park, so get her tired before you go.
Another thing is to socialize her in smaller groups. If you can set up a playdate with her and just one dog at a time, that’s great. Or maybe two or three dogs.
On your own with her, make sure you get to the point where she responds to the commands “watch” (for eye contact) as well as drop and leave it 99 percent of the time. This will take many repetitions each day in short sessions. Work with no distractions. Then build distractions and increase the value of the objects you are working with. You will also want to practice in areas where she is highly excitable. Listening to commands in your living room is one thing. Off leash at a dog park where she is likely the most excited is another. So practice somewhere in between.
Hi Lindsay,
I am happy to find your blog, and I hope you can advice me to handle my black Lab – Bravo- 1.5 years old possessiveness over things.
Bravo is not possessive over food, and i do the com and sit and stay before feeding him. He likes to play fetch-the-ball with me, or just put the ball in his mouth but come to me, and expect me to hold the ball while his trying to chew the ball.
But, he comes to possessive mode when he steal things such as sandals, towel, socks, etc. And he also possessive toward his poop and puke.
One day, unintentionally i pass through his puke and he bite me. The second time, he bite my dad, when my dad unintentionally pass his toy (stealing toy to be precise)
He wont let go the toy even I said “Drop”, and i already afraid of him biting again thus i never said “Drop” anymore. He still not interested in the “trade” thing.
What i do is then put clear area for him to play, so he cannot grab things. But once, he grab a thing, i will let him because I am afraid he will bite me again.
On an occasion, i try to put “play” mode, so he will come to me (as in ball fetch), but more likely , he seems to notice that the “play” mode only to get to his toy.
Please help me….
I have a foster dog who can act this way, although not as extreme. I met with a trainer last night to get a second opinion. Here are the suggestions she had for my dog. I think some may apply to your dog as well.
Use highly valued treats for your dog like pieces of real meat – chicken, hot dogs or whatever. And play games with him where you throw the toy and then give the command “drop” and he gets the treat. Hold the treat away from the toy and pick up the toy while he takes the treat so he is distracted. If you are worried he will bite you, then reach for the toy with your foot so he is less likely to get at your face or hand. Practice this many times in short sessions each day.
I would do all you can to prevent him from stealing objects for now while you keep working on drop with less valued things like his toys. He seems to get the most possessive of things he knows he shouldn’t have, correct? So once he starts to respond to “drop” reliably with his toys, you can start to try this with the other object as well.
I don’t know why he is possessive of his puke. That is strange.
You may want to keep his leash on at all times so you can step on his leash for more control.
I definitely want you to talk with a trainer in your area to get help with this. Black labs can be powerful dogs and I don’t want you to get hurt. It’s better to get help now before it becomes more serious.
Hi Lindsay!
We need some help. My husband and I adopted our dog from a pet store when he was about 3 months old. Ziggy is an april fool’s baby, so almost a year old. He is a german shepard/blue healer mix. He is sweet, and loving, for the most part. He know’s that when we give him treats, we say the word “easy” and he gently takes it from us. He know’s “sit”, “drop it”, etc. Now here are a few issues’s that we are having with him. He is terrified of the leash. Ever since day one, when we put it on him he drops to the ground and will NOT move. We literally have to pull him. And I hate that. As far as I know, he was not ever abused. I was told by the store owner who is very reputable that he came to the shop when he was six weeks old. We have papers on him. We don’t know why he does this. And because of this, we can’t take him for walks. We have a back yard, but since he is still a puppy he needs to run his energy out. I have tried leaving his leash on him just around the house for him to get used to it, and giving him treats to show that the leash is ok, but he doesn’t move.
The other issue, the main one, is his possesiveness. He is completely relentless. I am not sure if it is me or my husband he is being possesive over however. My husband can not give me a hug without Ziggy barking and whining and jumping up trying to break us apart. And marital relations? Forget about it! We tried to leave him in the room, but due to the dog jumping up on the bed and crying and whining and trying to break us apart by licking my husbands bum, we kicked him out of the room. Not literally kick, of course, we take him out of the room and shut the door. Now we have 3 children, our triple threat. We have an 8 year old, a 6 year old and a 1 year old; all boys. We can’t leave him out in the hall, he whines and cries and throws himself against the door waking up the children and making the erm… process unmanagable with all the noise. Again we are not sure who he is possesive over. I don’t know if it’s me or my husband. Anytime we are close, he tries to break us apart, but he comes to me or my husband after we break the embrace. Can you please help us? We would greatly appreciate it.
Side note, we plan on getting him fixed once our taxes come in.
It doesn’t sound like your dog is being possessive. It sounds like he has tons of pent-up energy and also some anxiety. You need to walk this dog. I am not sure I believe you can’t get him to move. Get a collar he can’t slip out of and run so he chases you.
If you absolutely can’t get him to walk, I highly suggest you get a trainer to help you accomplish this.
In addition to walking or running with him, you should play some serious tug of war games to help him get rid of extra pent-up energy. And work on obedience training. Does this dog know how to sit and stay for 10 minutes? That should be a goal. He needs a ton of mental exercise as well as physical.
As for as him getting aggressive when you and your husband hug, that behavior should be corrected the second the dog gets excited. Do not tolerate this at all. Keep his leash on him and step on the leash if you have to. And hug more often so the dog gets used to it. I would purposely hug one another 20 times per day. Get him in a down position and step on the leash right by his collar if you have no other way to stop him from jumping or nipping.
Stop allowing your dog in your bedroom, period, unless he is in a crate in your bedroom. That might be your best bet, actually. Or put a crate in a downstairs room as far away from your kids as possible.
Amber, I saw your post on Lindsey’s website about not being able to put a leash on your dog and thought I would put in my two cents because we had the same issue. We found a puppy two years ago and I guess since we hadn’t had a puppy in so long, really didn’t know that we were doing much wrong. Didn’t even think about a leash until he was quite a bit older and we couldn’t carry him anymore. He had to go to the vet but we couldn’t lead him there. I looked up all sorts of information on the web and finally hit on a few that helped. Like your dog, mine laid down and wouldn’t budge. In fact, he acted as if he was being punished — he went to hide under the table. Read that it was a good idea to put the leash on him while he ate, so he was distracted. This worked pretty well. Also, you can call him to you for a treat and put the leash on while he’s eating his treat. This way he will associate the leash with a goody ! Let him walk around the house (or yard) with the leash on, and you not hanging onto it. One website suggested that you could just cut off the last 8 inches or so of the leash and let that hang from his collar. It might be that he just doesn’t like the little bit of weight pulling on him, or it freaks him out to have something hanging off of him. If you have a second dog, let him see that dog with a leash on and you holding it. Worked for my boy. Little by little he was getting used to having the leash on and then we’d go outside to walk around. I would take treats (very small pieces, since you’ll be feeding him lots of them) and we would walk around the yard and I’d keep saying, good boy, good boy. Give him treats as he would walk with me, so he would know that walking with me was a good thing. It took a long time, but eventually it all worked. Just have patience. It got to the point that whenever he saw the leash he got excited about going for a walk in the yard with me. My issue now is walking him outside the yard and taking him to the vet. He wasn’t really socialized, since we didn’t know it was something we needed to do. He’s a good dog, even though he broke my leg last year !
Good luck. Don’t give up !! My dog did the same thing and now the leash doesn’t bother him at all.
Hi Lindsay, I have been up, down, left and right looking for some ‘honest’ advice. At last I think I have found the person to give it
Now then, I have a 15 month old Lab, Mitch. When he first arrived he was 8 weeks old. We were utterly stunned at how calm, well behaved he was on his first day in the family home. I took him for his first walk to start the bonding process. I let him off his lead and he stayed by my side for the duration of the walk. He met other dogs, children etc.
I live in a remote village in the Highlands, on our streer there is 10 houses. Mitch would run around the culdisac with the neighbours kids, ranging from 3 years to 13. I moved out of my house and into my Mums (who lived 50 yards away from my house) he knew the house, the layout and the rules. Zeke my mums Lab was boss
My Dad was very ill and Mitch would always pop into his bedroom to see him. Then Dad died, and its gone a bit wrong. Mitch was only 8 months old when he died. Mitch then became very sooky towards my Mum after Dad passed. Always cuddling into her, holding onto her sleeve with his teeth. Just not leaving her alone. We allow the dogs out in the garden for most of the day. One day, a lady walked past with her dog and Mitch cleared the fence and started bouncing around the other dog playing. The other dog attacked Mitch, The owner kicked Mitch in the face then tried to seperate the dogs, her hands got in the way and recieved a single puncture wound. It was unclear who caught her hand. Its ended up in court and consequently found out after my vet did a behavioral report on Mitch, Mitch has OCD for tennis balls and is a fearfull dog. Not fearfull of us, but Men. And this makes him protectice if myself and mum.
Going back to when dad passed. Mitch and Zeke both escaped from garden. It was -12 and they were out from 10:30pm to 6:00am. The police phoned to say a man had called them about two dogs stuck in a field houling and pining. It was about 1.5miles from our house. We jumped in the car and the man got in to take us to the dogs. We went over a cattle grid and there, huddled in the field shaking and pining was Mitch. Zeke wasnt bothered. It took me a good hour to get him in the car, he was clearly distraught. Ever since that night whenever we are in the car and someone walks by, especially a man, he barks, huffs and puffs and jumps around the car. Now he is obsessed by tennis balls and constantly has a cusion in his mouth he carries around in houae. When anyone comes into livingroom he picks a cusion up and sits on the couch, wagging his tail, looking all proud with himself with a cusion in his mouth! Why does he need the cusion as a crutch? Hes not aggressive in the house, or towards women. He just doesnt like men or other dogs. He sits timid next to men in vets etc. But fine towards my brother.
How can I stop him always having a cusion or ball?
Ive just had him castrated in the hope he will lose the territorial aggression.
I hope you can help
Louise xx
Louise,
First of all, I am very sorry to hear you lost your dad.
This was obviously a very emotional time for you and your family. Sometimes our emotions will affect our dogs in negative ways. Mitch seems to be overly attached to your mom, for example. This might be because he is reading her pain/sorrow and wants to protect her since she is showing “weak” energy.
In your comment, you mentioned all kinds of problems! I’m not sure I can help you with everything.
One way to gain more control of the dog is to limit his freedom. Keep a leash on him when people come over, for example. Simply do not allow him to pick up a cushion. Teach him a solid down/stay so he will obey for up to 10 minutes with no distractions. Then work up to a half-hour. Then do the same but with adding more and more distractions. Sometimes our dogs need to learn how to chill out.
I have written quite a few posts on my own dog’s tennis ball obsession. The most important thing for him is to make sure he obeys the command “leave it” and also “drop.” Teaching him a solid “stay” command has also been a life saver.
As for being fearful or aggressive around people and other dogs – I would get your dog out more. Walk him around all kinds of different people and dogs and situations to build his confidence. You want to push his comfort zone just a tiny bit and reward him. But don’t push him so much where he feels the need to bark/growl or flee.
Hi, I’ve just rescued a 4yr old siberian husky who is wonderful to be around. For the most part he gets a long with my other dogs, however we have noticed that he is being dominant to my other dog who was here first. The husky will snap at my other dog when he goes near his food bowl and will also run up and down our back porch and won’t let my other dog up on the porch and when he does get up he barks and snaps at him. The husky will also not let our other dog sit on his couch which he has had since he was a pup. The husky at all times tries to be on higher ground. We’ve only had the husky 2 days and I really have grown so attached to him and would hate to give him up however if I can’t stop this between the two then I will have no choice.
Please help… Any suggestions would be appreciated.
Cheers
Victoria
I’m going to direct you to my post on how to lead a dominant dog. I want you to practice the “nothing is for free” method of training. Also teach both dogs that good things come to those who wait. Remember that ultimately you get to decide who gets to sit on the couch and when. You get to decide who can eat what. You get to decide which dog you want to pet at what times. If one dog gets pushy, block him with your body and make him wait. Give the calm dog attention. With the couch, I would definitely make it a habit to have both dogs lying on the floor calmly before either is allowed on the couch, but especially the new guy. I don’t mean have them lie down, panting, staring at you, ready to jump up any second. I mean wait a good 10 minutes or so until both are calm and have forgotten about jumping up on the couch. Keep the leash on the new guy if that helps and step on his leash so he has no choice but to lie where you want him to be.
Here’s my post on how to handle a more dominant dog: http://www.thatmutt.com/2009/01/14/how-to-lead-a-dominant-dog/
Hi… I have an 8-month old Pomeranian(Spitz) puppy female (white). I stay with my mom and my dad. The problem is of late it had started to growl and snarl at my mom whenever i and my mom are talking. She has become too possessive of me. My mom does all the feeding,grooming.. etc but still it loves me more. Because of the aggression it exhibited in the past 3-4 days we gave it away to an animal shelter. But we took it back again hoping to correct it. It is in heat at the moment. It always sleeps on my bed. Can you suggest how to get it rid of the possessiveness towards me. I don’t want to send it away again. It is good 95% of the time except the fact that it yells horribly at strangers.
And one more important thing, when somebody comes home it yells and goes under the bed,it doesn’t let us chain it.How can i train it to come and wear the belt.
Please help… We really love it and want to keep it.
I’m going to give you some links to some similar posts you may find helpful.
This first one is to show the importance of you being a leader to your dog and blocking her from trying to control you and your mom:
http://www.thatmutt.com/2011/12/07/dog-owners-need-to-be-open-to-change/
And this post is about how insecure dogs will try to hide behind their owners to feel more secure. But sometimes, this insecurity leads to aggression. Check out the part about small dogs climbing into their owners laps to feel more secure. This is when a lot of small dogs start to become aggressive because they feel more powerful.
http://www.thatmutt.com/2011/11/11/why-does-my-dog-lean-on-me/
Hi I have a 1 yr old pure bread Lowchen puppy named Jasper. He’s very sweet and friendly and He never bites. The only issue we have with him is he gets very possessive of toys, treats or anything he gets into his mouth. If he grabs something and you try to take it away, he will start growling and jerk away from your hand. He doesn’t bite at all but like the article said i’m afraid if it isn’t corrected, it could escalate into something worse. He is totally fine if you have his toy or a treat in your hand and he is trying to get it from you, it’s only just when he’s got it. When he has something in his mouth, he will NOT let go. He’s got a grip of steel. Jasper can get pretty aggressive when someone tried to take something from his grasp. Although He is less aggressive around me, i think because he is more attached to me than the rest of my family. But I do believe some of the problem is from my younger brother.
He sometimes taunts Jasper or teases him. So ever time my brother is around, Jasper will run and get his toy thinking he is going to steal it from him. I have attempted to teach him to “leave it” by offering him treats when he has a toy and i have seen ‘some’ positive results but I feel like he only does it for treats and not when it counts. I’m not sure if this bit of information helps but A friend gave Jasper to us when he was about 6 months old. They got him from an ad online. They told us that Jasper was ignored most of his puppy life by the people who previously owned him. Always kept in his cage and never played with or taken out.
So any advice would be very much appreciated! Thanks
I have a foster dog who has some of the same issues you describe. I had a trainer come over just so I could get a second opinion. I liked her advice, and I will suggest the same to you.
Keep reinforcing the “drop” command, but do it in short sessions every day during play. For example, throw a ball, then offer the dog a highly valued treat (hotdogs, etc.) when he brings it back. Do this three or four times per session, enough to keep it fun so the dog doesn’t get bored. And do at least two sessions per day. Eventually, if you do this often enough, it should start to get ingrained in the dog’s head that “drop” is fun.
Do the same with leave it. Do it during play. And use highly valued treats.
When your dog does take something he shouldn’t have, you could try completely ignoring him. Simply get up and walk into another room. Sometimes he might actually be doing this for attention. You could also keep a leash on him and step on the leash so he can’t run off. Then simply wait him out. Stepping on the leash will prevent you from having to get your face and hands near him. You may be able to step on the toy and get it away from him with your other foot.
Overall, though, I recommend reinforcing the “drop” and “leave it” commands in a fun way.
Lindsay, thank you ever so much for the advice
I started the training with the ball just after I mailed you. I drop it infront of him, tell him to stay and or leave it while I walk away. I managed to walk out the livingroom and close the door. I returned and he hadnt touched the ball =) he is refusing to give the ball though. I need to trade him in order for him to drop it. I need to make him realise than even though the ball is his, but it is also mine and I can give and or take it whenever I want. We are getting there, slowly but surely.
As for going out, I walk him up high streets when out shopping, I can leave him outside a shop etc. Its once we are back in this,quiet village he wont tolerate other dogs and men.
Will try my very hardest to crack it.
I very much appreciate your help and will keep you posted.
Many thanks
Louise
xx
Best of luck! I would love to hear about your progress with him!
Hi Lindsay,
I have two dogs, she is 1 years old and I is 10. The eldest is not interested in toys, so the girl has always played with his toys without sharing with other dogs.
She knows the command “Do not touch that” and “drop” and plays with other people (children, adults, seniors ..). In addition, she shares her food with the older dog and other dogs.
However, she does not share his toys with other dogs and she is possessive when other dogs are ahead, even she ever been labeled with the teeth another dog because he have removed a toy.
she likes to take the toy in his mouth and the other dogs chase her, but if another dog tries to take the toy, she growls.
when this situation happens, I tell her NO and if she stops growling I award it with some food and caresses.
I do not know if I acted correctly and I don´t want she will more aggressive.
Excuse my English because I am Spanish and I do not speak English very well.
Thank you very much
Eve
I would keep reinforcing the “drop” command. Work with few distractions until she is 99 percent reliable. Then add more and more distractions such as another dog. Use highly valued treats like chicken to reward her when she drops on command. I wouldn’t correct her for growling because that is her way of communicating to the other dogs that she doesn’t want them to take the toy. If she learns not to growl she could skip the growling and bite instead. So in a positive way while you are playing fetch and that type of thing, practice “drop” in short sessions several times per day until it becomes natural for her to obey all the time.
Hello,
I have a 7 month old Siberian Husky that apparently I got from a puppy mill, thought they were a reputable breeder, but unfortunately found out the hard way that they took him away from his mom at 4 weeks before I got him at 6 weeks. I know that is young to get a puppy, but I had no choice they wanted to charge me if they kept him there past 8 weeks. When I brought him home he was seriously ill with coccidia and worms and infested with lice, so he did not exhibit canine possessive signs, but once he was healthier and growing I started to notice his food aggression at about 10 weeks old. He has bitten, once was when he was eating a rawhide. Another incident was after he was fed a treat and sniffing for crumbs my aunt decided to pet him around his face with both of her hands, she did not understand why he bit her. He just bit again tonight, he had found a wine cork on the table and was chewing on it, we tried to get it out of his mouth, tried “trading” him with food, he tried to eat the food with the cork in his mouth still. Finally when I had succeeded of getting it out my gf was releasing him and he turned his head and bit her finger. I have gotten him training sessions and nothing seems to work, if anything it made him worse. With treats in the beginning he would take them very hard, but was taught to take them gently with training and he has improved with that with me. Other people, I need to show them how to present the food to him so he doesn’t nip too hard. I’ve tried hand feeding him over the bowl of food, stepping in front of the bowl so he gets to realize that it’s mine and he will eat when i tell him to. I am working on “wait” with him, but he still hasn’t gotten that down, he’s impatient with food and when he eats he gulps it so I just spread it out in his crate or on the floor, so it takes him longer to eat. I walk him and he walks/runs on the treadmill daily for about an hour a day. From the beginning I have tried to assert my alpha with him so that he knows that I am pack leader. My PetSmart trainer gave me the name and number of a lady that she knows and she came to the house for three hours and used the gentle leader halter as an obedience tool for his food aggression, it had a negative affect and he lashed out later that evening on someone in the house. My guess is because this woman held him by the scruff on the back of his neck and made him scream till he was in the calm, submissive state of mind on the ground, this lasted almost five minutes once. I do not use her and will never use the gentle leader on him, especially since it cut into his muzzle. I’ve called every obedience trainer in the area and they all tell me that they use the gentle leader for obedience, since I refuse to use it, I cannot hire them. I’ve tried numerous approaches with him and I am not about to give up, I cannot afford to take him to the Raleigh behaviorist, she costs 475.00 for a 2 and a half hour session and prescribes medicine for the dog. And all these private sessions with a trainer are adding up, and honestly, none of them seem to help me or know what they’re doing. The last lady that I went to told me to hold him to the ground daily for 10 minutes and get him to used to that and to use a prong collar on him after she called him “bonehead” and even referenced him to Ted Bundy, needless to say, I won’t be seeing her again. I’ve considered trying to contact Cesar Millan to help, but I know he has so many cases that I doubt he’d choose to help me out of all the people that need help. I just want to get him some help before this continues to grow worse and worse and someone tells me to put him down. Any advice would help, thank you so much. Another thing I forgot to add, he only seems to show this aggressive behavior with food related items or things he think are food, not with toys. I can take toys out of his mouth with no growling or signs of possession.
Joy,
Sorry to hear about your troubles. Thank you for your comment on this blog. That would be awesome if you got a hold of Cesar Millan. Let me know if you do.
I always use the “nothing is for free” method of training which it sounds like you are doing. All dogs sit and wait several feet away while I prepare their food. They wait to be released before they can approach their bowls. They sit before heading outside and before coming back in and so on. Structure and exercise are so important so I’m very happy to hear you have been consistent with both of those. Usually people complain about their dogs but do not take the time to exercise them. Not the case with you. But I would absolutely work on the “wait” command with him. That is an absolute must. He should be able to lie down and “wait” of “stay” for a good 10 minutes even if there is a bowl of food out. I want that to be your goal. Obviously you have to start small – five seconds, 10 seconds and so on. I would keep his leash on during feeding times and any time you are working on training so you can always step on the leash and gain control and keep yourself a bit safer. It’s safer to step on the leash vs. reaching down and grabbing the collar.
I do recommend you find a good training collar to help you get more control of your dog for when he does become aggressive or possessive. Whether it’s a Gentle Leader or a prong collar or a regular slip collar – doesn’t really matter. What are you using now?
I fostered an American Eskimo who had some food possessiveness as well. He would practically bite your hand off trying to get at a piece of kibble. It was very frustrating and he bit me and others. I tried many positive reinforcement techniques but he was so nutty about food it never helped. One method was to spread peanut butter on my hands and the second his teeth touched my hand I was to pull it away and say “ouch!” As long as he used his tongue and gums he could have the peanut butter. It worked fine for the peanut butter but he never could apply that and stop biting if I had any type of solid food. For him, and maybe your dog, I really believe the only way to get him to stop that behavior would be a shock collar with a remote. I am not sure how you feel about shock collars (e-collars) but I would consider one. That way you could deliver a precise correction.
If you want to stick to the positive reinforcement approach, then I would reinforce the “leave it” command starting with items he doesn’t value too much so it’s not such a big deal to him. When he obeys, give him something wonderful instantly like a piece of chicken. Practice in short sessions several times a day every day and slowly add in things he values more like rawhides. You’ll have to keep finding treats that are an even better reward than the actual food item he is being possessive over.
Best of luck to you.
Joy my situations is very similar to yours.
3wks ago we rescued a 2 1/2yr old boxer who has been in rescue kennels for over 18months!!
We started by getting rid of the pent up energy(following all of ceser millans Ideas)Running,walking&cyclimg for a minimum of 2hrs a day ad have him on a long lead most of the morning with mr in my stable yard.
He was very aggressive around food,although we claim it,stand in front of it hold it etc and 99% time he is now very good.we are always tireing him out b4 meal times.
Although we still have I think fear aggressive &dominant aggressive issues.
We also have a 4 1/2 yr old boxer (both are neutered males).
If you sit on the floor he tenses up his tail goes upright and he starts by pushing you or leaning on you and then flares up aggressively. He does the same if you walk around if he has a toy near him.today he was calm&submissive soni gave him a pigs ear as I walked past him he bit me,I got him to calm down in the submissive position and then practises taking the pigs ear away giving it back ad stroking him etc,where he was good.
We always leave the house in front etc and keep him walking By our side on the lead and try do everything we can to convey we are the pack leaders. However he walks with hiss tail upright and quite tense,he dominantly headbutts other dogs we walk with and occasionally humans to which we give the ‘ceser touch ‘ to him.
If you try tonplay with him he flares up without a warming growl. When my other dog trys to initiate play in the house he tries to run away and roll over submissively eve though the other dog isn’t being dominant. We have searched our area for a behaviourist we agree with but can not find anyone who uses cesers techniques. Can u offer an advice?
Many thanks
Are you asking me or Lindsay? Where are you located. Do you always eat before he does and make him work for everything he gets from you; toys, food, affection, walks, etc? My dog isn’t so bad that if I walk by him when he’s eating he’ll bite. He’ll growl to warn if I approach too close sometimes or he feels threatened I guess, but I’m not acting in a threatening manner towards him, at least I don’t think I am. How does he do with his basic commands, sit, down, stay, leave it and drop it? You can email me at privatechase@gmail.com if you’d like.
-Joy
Carley,
As Joy said I recommend you work on getting your dog to lie down and stay no matter what. I think that should be a goal for all dogs, to stay for at least 10 minutes and ideally up to a half-hour or more. It teaches them some self-control. Once they can do that with no distractions, you can start adding distractions. In your case a distraction would be dropping a pig’s ear several feet away. When you work on these exercises, it’s important to keep the dog’s leash on so you have an easier time controlling him.
P.s I’m in England too and I don’t think the ‘ceser way’ is really used or understood !!
Hi I was addressing Lindsay but also anyone who can help. He is very glyphs at commands,he sits ,down,stays&waits. We are working on leave it as that is when he seems to claim whatever it is by tensing ,leaning over it so we have to stepson from of whatever it is to show it is ours.
Thankyou for your advice I’m sure we will get there it’s just going to take time,but just wanted to know we are going down the right route-I so wish ceser would come back to the uk!!
I have a 2 year old (NEUTERED) doberman who is highly intelligent. Although he has tons of energy, he listens on command very well. I can give/take anything from him with no problem, he comes immediately to call and has manners when you want him to. His only problem is that he gets very upset and possessive over his rope toy when my other dog tries to play with him. I can play tug of war with him all day and he doesnt behave this way- he will drop for me, play with me, give me the rope, etc with no problem, but not my other dog. Other toys and rawhides and things are fine, he doesnt think twice about sharing. Any suggestions?
Lindsay, I came to your website while looking for an answer. I hope you don’t mind that I also added a reply to Amber above about the leash issue with her dog. Will the information get to her via email ?
I am writing about my spaniel mix, Buddy. I also have a larger dog, Dalton, that we found as a puppy on the road. We also have a beagle, Sofie, who came to us as an older rescue. I tried to train Buddy and Dalton since they came to us as puppies, but have made a few errors by omission. They were taught that I own the food and they will now sit with a hand signal and wait for meals. I let them know they can eat by putting my hands together as if clapping. I’m also trying to do this for letting them in and out the door. Anyway, I’m getting away from the subject. I can get around Buddy when he’s eating, and for the most part he understands “drop it.” However, the problem I’ve been having is that he becomes possessive aggressive over other things. He usually will be next to me while I prepare the three bowls of food. If I am next to the food bins and a cat or the beagle comes nearby, he lunges and growls at them. He will do the same with a bag of garbage, if I’m getting ready to take it outside, or even a bag of cat litter going outside to the garbage. I’ve even seen him get possessive if a cat throws up a hairball. The food bins and the bag of garbage are not things he can get into his mouth, so how do I use the strategy of giving him something better ? I try to make him understand that Mommy owns these things, not him, and I will sometimes push him over on his back when this happens to show him that I am the alpha. Or stand over him. But he does it again a few days later. So far, I like all the answers you’ve given to others and am anxious to hear what you say about this. Thank you for taking the time to help all of us !